If You're An Older Woman, Dating Is Not Like It Was 30 Years Ago. Times have changed.
Learn How Older Men View Dating and Money In Their Retirement Years.
Learn How You Can Use This Information To Your Advantage.
As an older woman in your fifties or perhaps close to retirement age, would you date a man who insisted you pay for the entire cost of dating? Would you be willing to make a financial investment in a man who has the money but is not willing to pay his own way? Would you be willing to pay all the dating costs for several months knowing that the relationship may end at any time?
If the answer to these questions is 'NO', you now understand how older men feel about dating.
Older men nearing retirement and retired feel the same way about dating as you do. They don't want to pay for 100% of the cost of dating!
Dating is a risk and some men don't want to date someone who is able, - but not willing to invest any money in the relationship.
It's not just about money, it's about creating an equal partnership of sharing and love that flows both ways, - not just in one direction.
Most men are willing to share in the cost of dating, but fewer men are willing to pay for all dating expenses without being in a committed relationship - i.e. married, - but then of course if you're married you wouldn't be dating.
Essentially when you're dating, you're really just friends. There is no commitment. And it's rare to find a friend who is willing to pay for your fun, food, and entertainment without expecting something of equal value in return.
An older man who is nearing retirement or retired is concerned about financial security and independence just like you are.
They are older and wiser. They know it may not be as easy for them to make money as it was when they were younger.
They know there are women out there who will take advantage of them financially. They know that some women date only because they're looking for a 'sugar daddy' or a meal ticket. They know that older women don't look as good as they did 30 years ago. They know that most women have money. They know most older women are financially able to share in the cost of dating but are not willing to do so.
They know that over the course of several dates, several months, or several years, they will be giving up part of their financial security to date women who can walk away at any time without losing a dime.
No one, - male or female wants to be taken advantage of financially. Perhaps you're not like this, but I've run across many women who approach dating like they did 40 years ago and it's just not working for them.
Some women expect men to take them to expensive places and spend a lot of money on them just like men did when they were young.
When you were young things were much different than they are now. Your body has changed. Hormone levels have changed. Your goals about having children and raising a family has changed.
Your financial situation has changed. Society have changed too. Women have much more money than they ever had in the past.
And women today are fortunately treated as equals.
Today some older men are fabulously wealthy and some are not. Some women are fabulously wealthy and some are not.
Today men and women have an equal opportunity to be successful and financially well off.
The question is, how important is money to you? If you're looking for someone's money it's one thing. If you're looking for true love and money is not as important, it's another story.
If you're not willing to share in the cost of dating, many older men will stop dating you - even if they like you!
Some of these men might not have much money. On the other hand they might have tons of money. In either case they're not likely to tell you the real reason why they don't want to date you anymore.
If you have expensive tastes and aren't paying your own way, it's a red flag to most men, especially if they are well off financially.
If a man is ending the relationship because he feels a woman is more interested in money than in the relationship, he's not likely to say anything because most women will accuse him of being cheap (when it's really the other way around).
They've been there before and don't want to deal with angry comments such as 'all the men I've ever dated were more than happy to pay my way' or 'if you don't have the money you shouldn't be dating', etc. ...
Instead they'll make up some other story for not calling you again.
But the bottom line is, if you haven't been paying your own way, you'll never know the true reason why men lose interest in you. They're not going to tell you.
On the other hand if you pay your own way and are concerned about how much money your date is spending on you, you will make a much better impression as a woman looking for real love, not just money.
If the relationship ends you'll know for sure that it wasn't because you weren't willing to share in the cost of dating.
If you're a financially well off older woman and you're not getting many dates, why not ask men out? Most men will say yes if you're friendly and you're paying for the date.
Of course if you initiate a date and don't talk about money before a man says 'yes', take responsibility for that date 100%. That means everything including tips, parking, tolls, ... whatever.
If you made the invitation, don't expect a man to offer to pay although he might.
Don't accuse him of being cheap if he doesn't offer to pay during or after the date.
Whoever extends the invitation first gets to pay first. It doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman. After the first or second date you can talk about sharing in the cost of dating.
There is a risk you might pay for one or two dates with several men and it wont work out. But men take the same risk. Asking people out on dates is small financial gamble whether you're a man or a woman.
If you're not getting many dates, or your dates aren't going anywhere it might be because your beliefs on who should make the first move and who should pay for dates.
Times have changed. It's ok for women to ask men out on dates. And it's ok for women to pay for dates if they chose to do so.
Most men will find your new approach refreshing and flattering. If your dating beliefs are the same as they were 40 years ago, it's time to upgrade your outdated ideas now and start dating!
What can you do if you want to date and don't have much money?
Choose to go on inexpensive dates, eat at inexpensive restaurants, share meals, extend an invitation to enjoy a home cooked meal you've prepared. Rent movies and watch them on TV instead of going to the movies.
What do you do for fun now? Why not do those same inexpensive things with your date?